01 Agony

i've been thinking about this for awhile now and would like to be enlightened; approaching a beautiful person is verily verily underrated these days, and a disaster as well that in our culture, that when one approaches the other on a quiet/pretty-empty train ride (could be a bookstore, the damn convenience store in fact) per se; the result is usually appalling or repulsive - and random uncalled-for links to 'sexually stimulated' intentions would be conjured up in an instant.

is it really better, to 'buy someone a drink' at a sleazy ladies night gig, or better to just greet the girl who's been at the same bus stop (at usually the same time) reading, say, a nice novel, whatever. my point being; isn't it nice to just have people to talk to, the notion of how strangers are friends un-met. ok sure enough if the person u give, say ur email or number to, starts scammin' u with lowly shallow hints of 'you know what', that u ignore them? what if the human being that does say hi, is one with a beautiful mind - have kopi, or just plain hanging around and faggin a cigarette - while sharing really (be it) meaningful or fun-brainless conversation, all at the bloody comfort of the neighborhood, or not.

well, i for one, live for that shit. its people like these that i meet, make my space vibrant. for sure, u meet friends through mutual friends, organizations, school, etcetera - but the thought of how theres a link cheeses the vibe off at some point don't it? from the person you saw across the room - to accquaintance through a mutual friend - to exchanging numbers on a next 'chance' meeting (which isnt), to gradually 'friend', but cant really properly get comfortable in times of conversation with so many things in between, like circle issues to talk about.

when u meet someone u know absolute zilch about, not even his/her existance; and conversation starts to flow just for the easy truth of two human beings bloody clicking cos their souls are on par, isnt that quite a mad way to meet a person?

i had my fair share of such beauty, more with guys though, who eventually became my best friends (and i have few), but more downs than ups with the female kind. i met a lovely girl lately at a cafe, it was 5pm (trust me it was for the first time, i never knew anything about her), we hung out till 1pm the next day and i headed off to work real sleepy and dizzy, but the joy of such chance kept me going with random bouts of happy energy.

isn't it such a misery to be living in a space like mine? where no one cares for the wonders of all things unpredictable. that no one would give safety and regularity up for the slightest bit of whimsical mystery? what am i doing here still??????????????????????????????????????????